CONFESSIONS OF A STARBUCKS PASTOR

I'm in the throes of major project overload for my final year in grad school, so that means it must time for a blog post. LOL. I'm studying at my "branch office"; one of the local Starbucks where every barista knows my name. When I came up for air to order a decaf mocha (drink #2 today folks), I got hit with this thought. So here goes... Today's North American culture is increasingly directed to living well without leaving home. Think about it. With Amazon you can sit with your broken foot on ice and travel to any store and item you like. I ought to know, that's how I've survived this fall, pun unintended. When the array of packages began to flow, my bewildered husband asked where they came from. "From right here," I gestured, using game-show-model-hand-gestures to sweep over the chair and ottoman that has been my perch. Not only can Amazon ring your doorbell practically the second after you hit "place order", you can hire a servi...

You know how we constantly hear about the problems with people spending too much time on Social Media? Checking their email on vacation? Eating and texting? Well, what about this one? What do you think you would feel like if Amazon cut off communication for 2 days? That's what happened to me. I went from feeling all the shopping power with mere taps on my smart phone any moment of the day to feeling like a powerless, currency-less speck in the powerful Borg. It all started out as a typical day in class when a professor mentions a book we should add to our library that will be useful in practice. I quickly find the book on my Amazon account and click "place order". When I entered my email address, I got the error message that Amazon did not recognize my email. Say what? I tried a few more times and frustratedly waited for a break to call customer service and resolve this problem. Mind you, I couldn't email customer service because that would require me going...

For the past four and half years, I have been a mental health practitioner. That means I work for agencies that hire people to go into people's homes and provide skill services to various family members. The skills are medically approved necessities in order for them to function in every day life. The skills are needed for a number of reasons: perhaps there is a mental illness, disability or handicap. Perhaps someone is living with PTSD or the physical limitations following an accident. Perhaps a parent needs to learn how to parent a special needs child. Or, a special needs child needs to become competent in basic skills. Some people are in transition from homelessness to independent living. These are just a sampling of reasons why this form of care is provided. The good news for clients is that 100% of this care is covered by state insurance plans and top-notch agencies only hire people who are pursuing or already have their masters degree.  The client is getting a pro. If yo...

There was a cop show on TV when I was a kid called Dragnet . The main cop did not display any emotion as he walked the audience through re-enactments of a real LAPD crime. His face was neutral. When the interview subjects started to ramble, he would dryly state, "Just the facts, ma'am." In my master's work in mental health, I am obtaining additional training and certification so that I can provide the best care possible once I am set loose. My most recent certification focused on the facts as a method for de-escalating a mind gone wild with anxiety. Here's how it works in the most basic manner. There needs to be a balance between thinking about the reasoning and being totally emotional. Somewhere in the middle lies the goal to aim for when trying to live wisely . When you get overloaded on either side, you lose perspective and anxiety triggers. Are you with me so far? Good. We aim to keep things in control. So, how does that work, you ask? When you fir...

I dare you to find out if you attached in an optimal manner with your primary caregiver as a wee little ga-ga-goo-goo. Oh no, you might groan. She's gonna "therapize" us because she is so fixated on her grad program! Naw. I just want to share key things that light up my brain as I bumble along. I promise I won't use big words because I don't like them anyway. The big "a-ha" for me this moment is how we connected with our primary caregivers. For sake of brevity, I will refer to that person as a mother simply because in most cultures, that is in fact the case. Did you know that from birth, the way your mother reacts with you forms your personhood? The way you think about yourself? The way you interact with others? How you feel? No wonder the ancient psychologists used to "blame it on the mother". What I didn't know is that there is science behind it, and it's pretty simple. If you were blessed to have someone who oohed and ...