DIY Stress Management Tips
It's a new year. Everywhere we look or listen, a message about some form of "new you" confronts us.
I don't make Resolutions anymore. I used to. One of the dumbest ones was in college when I vowed to only drink water for the rest of my life so my skin would be as lovely as a friend's grandma one day far, far away.
After working with people for so many years, it occurs to me that there is one resolution we could all subscribe to every day. Chill out. Most of our stress resides in some barn corner of our minds where it replays itself until we are either in a tizzy or apologizing for our actions or words. I work on helping people get in their heads and tackle those nasty thoughts and step out of the stress cycle.
Here are some of the tips I share that really work. You just have to remember them when life is blowing up or threatening to swallow you:
Go Outside and Change Your View. Focus on nature. The clouds, the sound of a bird in a tree. The leaves blowing. Take 10 slow, deep breaths. Walk around for at least 10 minutes and focus only on the natural, outdoor beauty.
Talk to Yourself. Envision a mini-rational-you sitting on your shoulder that has the voice of reason. Tell your anxious self that the world really will not come to an end. You will make it through this. You will do what it takes to handle this. Call yourself "honey" and "sweetheart" or other gentle endearments. Assure yourself. And please do speak out loud. Then you have thought it, said it and heard it.
Push Through. Pick the smallest task you need to do in order to overcome the situation and do it. For example, the house is trashed and kids are running wild. Pick a simple task like putting all the shoes in a basket to get you started. Or, gather the dishes, rinse and stack them. Wipe down a clean section of the counter. Break it down into steps you can check off the master list. You will notice a strong sense of accomplishment as you see completion, one piece at a time.
Say No to Temptation. Limit the number of people you confide in, and the number of times to speak about your sress. The more you hear yourself speak it, the more stressed you will get. Say no to those reoccurring thoughts - change the subject in your mind. And please do not place yourself in a situation that reminds you of your stress. That means no going to a wedding in the midst of a nasty divorce. Simply say "I can't do this at this time". Period.
Carefully Ask For Help. There are people out there who can help you on your way. Make it your intent to find them and ask for some help. It might be counselor, pastor, social worker or a support group. A third party's objectivity will help you keep your head above water and on track. Just remember you will have to make the effort initially. No one is going to walk up to your door first.
Take a Bath. Or anything along those self-care lines. If you can afford a pedicure or a massage, some pampering is always beneficial. But you can pamper yourself on a budget, too. Remember, airlines always tell you in the event of turbulence to put on your oxygen mask first. Then you can help others. This principle applies to you, too. You are no good to your loved ones if you aren't eating and sleeping well so go ahead, be nice to yourself.
Remember, Progress Takes Time. Resist the urge to be impatient. Results come in small steps. You will look back and be amazed at what you have come through if you purpose to hang in. A blanket is knit one stitch at a time.
I like to think of our lives as tapestries in the making - everything blends together to create good. Even the "bad" stuff can be used for good once you have healed from it. As a follower of Christ, I include prayer in all of the above suggestions. Not only do I ask for God's help, I listen for his words and I thank him for his blessings. You can even see them in the midst of crisis if you take the time to pause and alter your focus.
I don't make Resolutions anymore. I used to. One of the dumbest ones was in college when I vowed to only drink water for the rest of my life so my skin would be as lovely as a friend's grandma one day far, far away.
After working with people for so many years, it occurs to me that there is one resolution we could all subscribe to every day. Chill out. Most of our stress resides in some barn corner of our minds where it replays itself until we are either in a tizzy or apologizing for our actions or words. I work on helping people get in their heads and tackle those nasty thoughts and step out of the stress cycle.
Here are some of the tips I share that really work. You just have to remember them when life is blowing up or threatening to swallow you:
Go Outside and Change Your View. Focus on nature. The clouds, the sound of a bird in a tree. The leaves blowing. Take 10 slow, deep breaths. Walk around for at least 10 minutes and focus only on the natural, outdoor beauty.
Talk to Yourself. Envision a mini-rational-you sitting on your shoulder that has the voice of reason. Tell your anxious self that the world really will not come to an end. You will make it through this. You will do what it takes to handle this. Call yourself "honey" and "sweetheart" or other gentle endearments. Assure yourself. And please do speak out loud. Then you have thought it, said it and heard it.
Push Through. Pick the smallest task you need to do in order to overcome the situation and do it. For example, the house is trashed and kids are running wild. Pick a simple task like putting all the shoes in a basket to get you started. Or, gather the dishes, rinse and stack them. Wipe down a clean section of the counter. Break it down into steps you can check off the master list. You will notice a strong sense of accomplishment as you see completion, one piece at a time.
Say No to Temptation. Limit the number of people you confide in, and the number of times to speak about your sress. The more you hear yourself speak it, the more stressed you will get. Say no to those reoccurring thoughts - change the subject in your mind. And please do not place yourself in a situation that reminds you of your stress. That means no going to a wedding in the midst of a nasty divorce. Simply say "I can't do this at this time". Period.
Carefully Ask For Help. There are people out there who can help you on your way. Make it your intent to find them and ask for some help. It might be counselor, pastor, social worker or a support group. A third party's objectivity will help you keep your head above water and on track. Just remember you will have to make the effort initially. No one is going to walk up to your door first.
Take a Bath. Or anything along those self-care lines. If you can afford a pedicure or a massage, some pampering is always beneficial. But you can pamper yourself on a budget, too. Remember, airlines always tell you in the event of turbulence to put on your oxygen mask first. Then you can help others. This principle applies to you, too. You are no good to your loved ones if you aren't eating and sleeping well so go ahead, be nice to yourself.
Remember, Progress Takes Time. Resist the urge to be impatient. Results come in small steps. You will look back and be amazed at what you have come through if you purpose to hang in. A blanket is knit one stitch at a time.
I like to think of our lives as tapestries in the making - everything blends together to create good. Even the "bad" stuff can be used for good once you have healed from it. As a follower of Christ, I include prayer in all of the above suggestions. Not only do I ask for God's help, I listen for his words and I thank him for his blessings. You can even see them in the midst of crisis if you take the time to pause and alter your focus.
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